Summer Recap: "NYC Fashion Girlies Beware"
Plus, a conversation with Allison P. Davis about "delulu dressing."
Hello! Welcome to my newsletter and back to the chaos of real life.
Of course, I leave New York City for ONE SECOND, and an incredible tale of CRIME and FASHION unfolds.
I’m talking about the case of the Tinder Tabi Thief. If you’re unfamiliar, at the beginning of Labor Day weekend, a woman who goes by @NextLevelLexuss on TikTok sent out something like an SSENSE Amber Alert: “Ladies of NYC, be-fucking-ware,” she warns in a video posted on her profile, which now has over a million views. “This man is out here on Tinder and Hinge, and he will steal from you.”
On the screen, we see “Josh,” a 23-year-old man with a mustache and a nose ring who claims on his various profiles to be five-foot-ten. “This a story about how that fucker stole my Mary Jane Tabis,” she continues. (For context: Tabis are those hoof-like Maison Margiela shoes. The Mary-Jane style in question retails for $990.)
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The story, which is kind of long, but full of suspense, begins like this:
@NextLevelLexuss is walking around Soho one day when she “locks eyes” with a “really cute guy,” she recalls. Later, he messages her on Tinder saying something like: “Hey, did I see you downtown?” RED FLAG NUMBER ONE. (Wait, was she wearing Tabis?? I asked in a comment but she hasn’t responded.)
They start chatting, and eventually meet up for drinks. She says he seems like a guy she would “hang out with for a little fling and just sleep with.” He’s persistent, so that’s exactly what happens. This is now fashion’s Cat Person.
“Before we sleep together, we’re chatting about fashion and stuff, and [how] he really wants Tabis,” she continues. RED FLAG NUMBER TWO. “I’m like, ‘Oh yeah, I have some Tabis,’ and he’s like, ‘Oh, I really want the boots.’” (She has the boots as well.)
Yadda yadda… The next morning, he gathers his things and leaves her apartment. Hours pass, and then she notices that her Tabi Mary-Janes are GONE. (Her boots, however, are still there.) She turns her apartment upside-down, but they’re nowhere to be found. She then goes to message him, only to find he’s ALSO gone. Unmatched! Blocked! “And I’m like, oh no, this bitch stole my fucking shoes,” she says.
A lot of reactions have been something like: Seriously, Tabis?? Tasteful thieves used to go after the likes of Manolo Blahnik and Jimmy Choo. But what interests me about this saga, (which I suggest you watch until the very end), is the fact that Tabis now seem to be just as covetable, if not more.
For years, Tabis were the go-to “fashion shoe.” To wear them was to say: I get it; you don’t. (If you want to know more, read the full SSENSE breakdown.) Now, though, the appeal of these “insider” shoes is much more widespread, and they’re much easier to find. Based on how many people watched @NextLevelLexuss’s video and galvanized to help her get them back, you could even argue that Tabis have become borderline normal. *Gasp!* I won’t go as far as saying Tabis are “trad,” even though that has a nice ring to it, but I mean…
Clearly, people love Tabis enough to go to great lengths for them. I don’t dislike them, but are they the shoes I would steal? Nope.
SUMMER SIDEWALK REPORT
The Hair Clip That Haunted Me
It followed me everywhere, and in every color. I saw it at Starbucks and Sweetgreen; in Prospect Park and Grand Central; at Bagel Pub in Park Slope and Joe Pop’s bar on the Jersey Shore. I saw it while camping and at a country fair. I even saw it at an airport in Portugal. I saw it on a lot white women, for sure. But really, the rectangular hair clip has mass appeal. Why? Where did it come from? There were plenty of plagues this summer, but this is one we’re not talking about enough, in my opinion.
I’m aware that claw clips have been a thing for a minute now. Bella Hadid, Kendall Jenner, Hailey Bieber — they all love them. “Claw Clips Claw Their Way Back” read a Times headline last fall. “I have quit the ponytail,” declared my cousin this summer. But what is it about this particular claw clip that people love so much?
For starters, it’s cheap. You can get two for $5 at Walmart and 15 for $9 on Amazon. (Nicer ones go for a little more at Target, but still under $10.) One woman at the Hudson Amtrak station told me she got hers at the Gap so that she could hit the free shipping minimum. But a lot of clips are cheap. I think people like this one for the same reasons they like The Amazon Coat: it’s not associated with a particular era or brand. It just looks nice and gets the job done without breaking the bank or calling too much attention to itself.
Aesthetically, I think the rectangular shape also offers a sleek, more contemporary, more expensive-looking alternative to the cutesy ‘90s butterfly clip. “I used to wear [hair clips] all the time as a child, and really liked them,” my cousin, who’s now in her late-30s, explained. But “the square shape is totally new. I feel like it’s much more pulled together.” She bought an 8-pack on Amazon and wore a pale pink one on her recent trip to New York. She fit right in.
The Trendy Shoe That Still Baffles Me
You may have noticed a certain booger-colored hemp plastic clog all over NYC this summer as well. They’re by a French brand called Plasticana, which was founded in 1998, but they arrived in Brooklyn in a big way about five years ago, when Salter House, a home goods and clothing store on Atlantic Avenue, opened and started carrying them. (Jacob Gallagher, the men's fashion columnist at the Wall Street Journal, now calls them the “Air Cobble Hills.”) Designer Emily Adams Bode, who is friends with one of Salter House’s founders, was inspired to include the shoes in her FW20 show, which eventually brought them to the Lower East Side. And then GQ fell for them the following year as well.
I get that Plasticana clogs are more affordable and lightweight than plastic Hunter boots or Birkenstocks. They’re also French. But what I will never understand is why people choose to wear these hemp plastic gardening clogs on the streets of NYC during the summer. Are their feet not suffocating??
When I asked my friends if they have, in fact, been dying in the name of fashion all summer, they admitted that, yes, it can get a little toasty in there. But they wear them with socks! As if that’s supposed to make it better. Doesn’t that just make your feet even hotter??
“I think my feet were ok!” says Nick Williams, co-founder of Small Talk and proud Plasticana clog wearer. “But honestly, maybe the move is to use an X-acto knife to turn them into bootleg Crocs.”
Now that’s an idea I can get behind!
RETAIL REPORT
Openings
There are a lot of new stores opening in New York, which is exciting! The one I’m seeing the most on my feed is Dae, a restaurant-slash-store from two Opening Ceremony alums (RIP) that sells hard-to-find Korean designer goods. It looks like a lovely place to hang out. (At least according to their aesthetically pleasing Instagram.) I’m excited to see if it lives up to the hype.
***If you’d like me to share information about your store opening/event, please email shoprat@substack.com. I’d like to make this a more regular/thorough thing!
Closings
Last month, I saw an 80% off sign at the Agnes B. store in Soho and obviously went in. I learned that after 12 years, the store is closing!!! The brand opened its first location at 116 Prince Street in 1984, and then it’s second on Madison Avenue, which is currently being renovated, shortly thereafter. The latter is now the only one left. I’m glad the brand isn’t leaving New York forever, but it does feel like a loss for downtown. Paging Joana Avillez!!!
An Unhinged Text from The RealReal?
If you’re new here, I have a love-hate relationship with The RealReal. This summer, I received an email from yet another disgruntled customer, (since writing about the company, I get them a lot), but this one was particularly shocking. The customer claims that when she declined to consign with The RealReal, (they text you constantly), she received a very rude reply back…
The RealReal declined to comment.
FEED REPORT
Here are the three biggest trends I noticed on my feed this summer:
Tables on the edge of water. This one is funny to me, because when I think of dinners by the ocean, I think of terribly cheesy engagement experiences at resorts, so I guess it’s having something of a renaissance.
.5 zoom. I know Gen Z has been on this for a while now, but my aging friends and I are just starting to warm up to it and, for the most part, it does make everything/everyone look better.
Despite my seriously unserious trend story about olives for NYMag, cherries were the stone fruit of the summer, specifically cherries on ice. I swear other restaurants did this besides Casetta, but I was told that this very easy thing you can definitely prepare at home cost “under $10” there. Part of the thrill was that it was off-menu. “We saw another table with them and had to get our own,” said one customer.
“Delulu Dressing” With Allison P. Davis
This summer, I learned that the kids are saying “delulu” now instead of “delusional.” It’s a K-Pop thing? It’s a TiKTok thing? It’s a TikTok K-Pop thing? All I know is that this video gave me a new outlook on life. (And that my past “situationship” was definitely a “delusionship.”) I told my friend and former colleague, Allison P. Davis about delulu, and we started talking about it more in the back of an Uber one night. (I know I said I wouldn’t discuss TikTok trends in this newsletter, but delulu is about surviving real life, and Allison and I were determined to put it into practice.) Being the genius that she is, Allison mentioned how delulu can play a role in getting dressed, and in that moment, “delulu dressing” was born.
Emilia: What does “delulu” mean to you in the context of getting dressed?
Allison: To me, the easiest way to explain it is: "dressing for the reality you want to exist in," with a sprinkle of "dress for the job you want.” It's not cosplay, and it's not a reactionary, fuck the man, I'll wear what I want assertion of radical body positivity, either (i.e., when I wear a neon green bandage skirt even though I have a visible belly and some might tell me that's a no-no). Delulus have no politics, no country, no earthly ties. They are immaterial; bodiless.
Also, delulu dressing is not manifestation dressing — the laws of “if you build it, they will come,” do not apply here. (If I wear the Row, it is because I am dressing for a reality where I believe I can afford the Row, not trying to manifest Row money.) It isn't really even "dressing like you belong," because those kinds of questions don't exist in a state of delulu. In a delulu, you are already as rich, as hot, as famous, as right about the conspiracy, as whatever it is you want to be. Your clothes are just matching that.
A good rule: You want your delulu outfit to inspire people to ask "what are you wearing?" But you respond "thank you!" because you do not defend delulus; you just vibe in them.
What does the opposite of delulu dressing look like?
I don't want to be rude, because I own two pairs of pants from Everlane, but Everlane.
What was your most delulu outfit this summer? In what way(s) was it the solulu?
I was going to a garden party at the beginning of August, and it was so humid that everything was wet. Humans had reached their saturation point. All I wanted was to go to a garden party in autumn, so I wore a red and yellow knit dress that was "transitional" weight, at best. In my delulu, I wouldn't sweat. Being seasonally anachronistic — def a type of delulu dressing.
What were you wearing during your most delulu situation this summer?
I've been in an emotionally questionable relationship all summer and I'm certainly reflecting it sartorially. Like, straight-up dressing like a protagonist in an early aughts rom-com: lots of spaghetti strap dresses and going out tops with jeans. Mary Jane shoes and BALLET FLATS. Lip gloss, blow-outs. Lingerie.
We went to a sex party together, and the outfit I wore there, before clothes were moot, was truly "Nora Ephron x Kink": a black sheer t-shirt, a patent leather pleated knee length skirt, black ballet flats.
Nora Ephron x Kink really is my preferred reality, though, so I have no regrets about any of it.
How do you plan to celulu delulu this fall? (Sartorially speaking.)
I bought some cocktail shrimp earrings from Susan Alexandra, and I can't think of a single place I will wear them, which means every time I wear them, I'm turning it into a reality in which cocktail shrimp earrings are the correct dress code. I'm interested in sweater vests and pleated skirts and boots — sort of a "Back to School at a Seven Sisters campus" because, as mentioned above, I've spent my summer making dubious decisions regarding men, and am interested in creating a "blank slate, mostly women, not jaded, fresh start" reality over here. Dressing like there are no consequences! Delulu celulued.
I also think Tabis are inherently delulu.
They’re Tabulu!
OK BYE
this will most certainly become my favorite newsletter and I know that because your collection of claw clip pics killed me 😂it only got better from there