Rat Diet No. 3

Black Friday edition.

6 p.m. is the new 8 p.m.; September is the new August; and apparently, the week before Black Friday is the new Black Friday because everything I want is already on sale and quickly selling out. I’ve done some damage in the last 48-hours, so I thought it would be helpful to write down a list of rules for myself moving forward:

• DO NOT BUY ANYTHING ON FINAL SALE UNLESS YOU’VE TRIED IT ON BEFORE

• DITTO FOR UNDERWEAR AND/OR BATHING SUITS

• YOU ARE NOT GOING TO GET INVITED TO *THAT* MANY HOLIDAY PARTIES

• YOU DO NOT NEED MORE GOLD SHOES

• YOU ALREADY HAVE SEVERAL BLACK COATS AND YOU DON’T GO OUTSIDE THAT MUCH ANYWAY

• JEWELRY IS OKAY BECAUSE IT ALWAYS FITS AND YOU CAN PASS IT DOWN TO YOUR GRANDKIDS WHEN YOU DIE AND LEAVE THEM WITH NOTHING ELSE BECAUSE YOU SPENT ALL YOUR MONEY ON BLACK FRIDAY

I also suggest starting a Notes app list on your phone of everything you’ve purchased, so that you don’t fall prey to Black Friday Amnesia. (Also known as delulu.) Below, everything I’ve consumed this month. This does not include everything that will inevitably be RETURNED.

What I bought on sale:

• I combined two gift cards to finally get these green Sophie Buhai earrings. There’s one pair left.

• More monogrammed pajamas. I don’t like those trendy Tekla ones, sorry!

• This Rachel Comey jumpsuit. *I broke my final sale rule with this one 😬

• I found these Toteme boots on Depop for much, much less.

Left: Completedworks hoops. Right: Sophie Buhai earrings.

What someone else should buy on sale:

• These Completedworks hoop earrings that look like gift ribbon.

• And/or these Panconesi serpent earrings.

• This Chopova Lowena fish necklace for a future beach vacation.

• Speaking of vacation, look at this Courregès sunset dress.

• This Marc Jacobs swirl dress, although I’d wait for the price to drop more.

• Those gold Simone Rocha flats I wrote about this fall are now marked down from really expensive to just expensive, here and here.

• It’s so annoying how well this stuff works.

Left: ‘S Max Mara coat. Right: Toteme boots.

What I bought that’s not on sale:

• This Sophie Lou Jacobsen squiggle tray. Daniela Jacobs of ARC objects influenced me! I can now drink coffee in bed without fear.

• This gold Attersee button-up shirt for New Years Eve. I said no gold shoes, not no gold shirts!

  arc_objects

  

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What I want that’s not on sale:

• These two are tied for sexiest knee-high boots of the year.

• This vintage leopard print coat. (Yup.)

• This tattered New York City Ballet t-shirt.

• This Deji Studios WFH set.

• This beautiful sweater and everything this brand makes.

• And

  Becky Malinsky
  made me reaaaally want this ‘S Max Mara coat. I’m on the hunt for a vintage version.
  olsenoracle

  

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What I Screenshot-ed on The RealReal:

I’m freaking out over this 1997 Absolut Vodka x Versace bag!!!!!!!

I also love that someone actually wore these Balenciaga joots. They must be Julia Fox’s, right??

What I read when I wasn’t shopping:

• Mel Ottenberg’s conversation with Rick Owens for Interview magazine. “I always say, it only takes one Donna Summer song of sit-ups every day,” he tells the editor-in-chief of how to get ripped. “It’s not that hard.” Rick’s sit-ups song of choice is “I Feel Love,” of course, but Mel made a full Giorgio Moroder disco playlist to help you get that resort bod.

• GQ’s interview with Tom Ford. Another very good conversation with an editor-in-chief. (Who needs writers??) Ford is a pull-quote king, but I was moved by how much of an open book he is here. We never get that from designers, or anyone famous, anymore.

• What do men really want? To speak words good, apparently. It’s nice that Taylor is teaching Travis how to read 🥲

What made me lol:

• This woman who accidentally got a boulder stuck in her shoe.

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Happy shopping! Don’t forget to go outside :)