Notes on Holiday Parties
What to wear and how to serve butter.
Congratulations! We’ve finally reached the end of the holiday party marathon, and what a run it was. After going out 16 of the last 21 nights, I have some notes…
The Best Time to Start:
For T magazine, I recently covered a holiday party hosted by the founders of Roman and Williams at their NoHo loft. It started at 4 p.m., which I thought was great. Now that so many people work from home, an early start time seems more doable, and if you’re in the office, it’s an excuse to leave. Then you’re out the door by 9 p.m., at which point you can grab a late dinner, or, if you’re me, take the subway back to Brooklyn and be in bed by midnight.
For my own holiday party this year, I decided to host from 7-10 p.m. on a Tuesday night. (Weekend competition is too fierce.) I figured that would give people enough time to eat something beforehand, and the party’s over by 11 p.m., allowing you to put on “Dance Yrself Clean” and do all the dishes before you fall asleep.
The Best Way to Send Out Invites:
I don’t like a Close Friends invite blast. I’ve done it before, and the feedback I’ve gotten is that people want a direct message, so that they know you actually want them to be there. Maybe that sounds needy, but I get it. Close Friends just feels lazy and impersonal. Now that I have everyone’s emails (mwahaha), I’ll send out a save the date way in advance with some dress code instructions. People need time to plan their outfits!
Something my friends Alix and Em did this year that I really appreciated was they sent out a note beforehand warning guests that it was a SHOES OFF party. As someone who often puts together an outfit shoes first, I was grateful for the heads up. God forbid I wore bad socks or even, dare I say, skinny jeans with boots. Keep your friends safe.
Who to Invite:
I would only allow 1-3 of your very best work friends. That’s what office holiday parties are for, and you probably haven’t seen your real friends in a while because you’ve been working too hard.
How to Decorate:
No shade to Gohar World, but you can find a lot of the same stuff on Etsy for way cheaper. I bought a set of five strawberry candles, for example, for $10 on Etsy and put them on a platter with real strawberries to add an element of danger to the party. (A set of four costs $32 at Gohar World, by comparison.)
The fake food thing is fun, but I think we should all be challenging ourselves to do a bit more. I was inspired by Xavier Donnelly, the new creative director of Ash hotels, who seemed to cover his entire apartment (and by extension, my entire Instagram feed), in metallic silver foil. Now that’s commitment.
URGENT QUESTION: Where the heck can a girl find mistletoe these days?? I feel like we’re experiencing a shortage cc: NYTimes.
The Best Food to Serve:
Unless you’re Alison Roman, you’re probably not serving a whole meal at your holiday party. I prefer sweets and savory snacks. Every year since high school, I’ve baked this Florence Fabricant (incredible name) red velvet cake, and invited everyone to wear as much red as they have in their closets to match. We love a theme! If you’re going to make something from scratch, I suggest doing it the night before. And, oh, try not to mix up teaspoons and tablespoons… The one year I did that, my friends tried to comfort me by saying that the cake “didn’t taste that bad.” In fact, it was “kind of umami,” they said. And that’s the year I learned that all my friends are LIARS!!!
Even when it’s not umami, I always have so much cake left over at the end of the night, so this year I got some to-go containers and turned into an Italian grandma by forcing everyone to go home with something, even Twizzlers.
At other parties, I noticed a lot of crafty shrimp towers, and towers in general. This is probably a TikTok thing. The most creative example of playing with food that I saw this year was the butter village Alix and Em made for their party. The only affordable townhouses in New York!
RANDOM BONUS PRO TIP: When I covered that aforementioned party for T, the chef told me she used sea salt with gold flakes in it, which her friend found in France. Unfortunately, I didn’t catch the brand name, but I looked it up later and found this. It’s expensive, so I kind of trust it? A good last minute gift.
The Best Drinks to Serve:
Batch cocktails can get ugly. This year, I was introduced to the Kir Royale and I’m into it, mostly because it’s red. I think if you’re going to focus on something, though, let it be ice. Get creative with ice cubes, or, if you’re Jean Prounis, get a giant ice sculpture in the shape of a human head for your party.
What Music to Play:
The sign of a good party (a mingling one, at least) is when there are so many juicy convos happening, the music doesn’t even matter. You only have to come up with a playlist for the first 15 minutes and the last 15 minutes, I think.
What to Talk About:
If you’re traveling and where. I genuinely want to know, and can you please share your Google Doc?
Which credit cards are the best credit cards
What happened to your SSENSE package
Bella Hadid’s Lyme disease journey
How to quit your job
What Not to Talk About:
Your job
Your open marriage
Taxes (my bad)
That video you saw on TikTok (also my bad)
What to Wear:
Even though it may be freezing cold outside, it’s important to remember that New York City apartments with radiators are like hot yoga studios. (Side note: Here’s a fun radiator fact and good conversation starter.) So I decided to try the infamous pant-less trend this year with some cashmere Ferragamo shorts I found on sale + a shrunken J.Crew sweater. Personally, I felt amazing, and like it wasn’t that big of a deal. But would I ever wear this look out of the house? I’m not so sure. I’d maybe go for these Vaquera pants, instead.
Happy holidays!!! May your days be cheeky and tight.
NEXT TIME: My last Rat Diet of 2023.
Trader joe's for mistletoe!